An Open Letter to Families

To cool families everywhere:

Thank you! First off, thank you for being awesome. I know you may not always feel awesome, like when your kids are going nuts in public places and you think everyone hates you. But I would like to let you know that, while I can't speak for everyone, most of us do not hate you at all! Personally, I love you. You are fabulous!

I like families! I like seeing you at Mass, and at Wal-Mart, and at the library, and when I'm walking down the street on a sunny Saturday afternoon. Thank you for being a witness to the fact that children are really great! Thank you for having your kids, for loving your kids, for raising your kids. Society doesn't really appreciate you, I know. But for what it's worth, I do! And I know lots of other people who appreciate you, too. I know we don't say it enough.

After spending four years at a wonderful college, almost exclusively with people my own age, I came to an important conclusion: that's not real life! As fun as it was, I wouldn't actually want it to last forever. My life would be impoverished if I never got to hang out with people both older than me and younger than me: with 2-year-olds, 88-year-olds, and everyone in between (and older, and younger)! The family is where all of these people are most likely to collide - and I love it! I want in.

As a single 20-something living on my own, away from my own family, I need you. You might assume that my life is exciting; that since I'm young and unattached, I am having much more fun without you. Nothing could be farther from the truth! Actually, one of the coolest things I possibly could be doing is to hang out with you. Where's all the action at? Not at my apartment... when I walk into a room, it's just as I left it (and before you get the wrong idea, it's neither clean nor organized). It takes a long time for my fridge to go from full to empty. Unless I turn on some music, it's quiet. These are all probably really exciting concepts to you... but to me, your home is the one teeming and overflowing with life! Whether it's babies crying or a toddler spilling cheerios on the floor or grade school kids practicing the piano or middle school kids agonizing over pre-algebra homework, there's bound to be something going on!

Here's the thing, though: I don't want to intrude on your private sphere. I know that you're busy, and things are crazy, and that you're probably often sleep-deprived. While I'll say hi to you and have a friendly chat when I see you, I'm not going to want to impose or be a nuisance. I know you've got a lot going on. So if you're okay with others joining in on your family life from time to time, I'm going venture a guess that most of us are probably going to need an invitation. I'll just lay it all on the line right now: I don't mind if your house is messy. If your baby spits up on me, that's life... I have this nifty little contraption at my place called a washing machine, so bring it on. If your kids aren't perfectly behaved, it's okay (what would that even mean, anyway?!). If your high schooler has some 'tude from time to time, I won't judge you or think you've failed as a parent. Really, I just think you're cool and I want to hang out with you - whether that means playing with your kids while you do laundry, coming over for dinner, or going along to the park with you. (This letter was inspired by a great family I know that often sits with me at Mass, and invited me along to the movies with them today.)

Dear families: you inspire me, and every time I see you, you give me a chance to encounter something much more real than what I can find just sitting here in my living room. Thank you for being wonderful and bringing me so much joy! My life is certainly better and more full because of you.

In love and gratitude, and on behalf of all those who feel the same way,
Katie